Thinking about the 40’s... By Ana

Today I received a letter from an old friend of mine, a friend of youth. A paper letter! Fragile in appearance, deep in content, authentic at heart. I cannot express the way I felt, how happy I was!... And, to me, happiness always makes me think…

In August I turned 40. I even postponed leaving for holidays to celebrate it with the whole family! A large part of my friends on their 40’s also wanted to mark their passage in a special way. And even some of the male friends couldn’t escape from this trend. Here and there I was reading some news about the magic of this age… And I was thinking about it…

After all, what is different about the 40’s? Why do we want to mark them in a special way and we forget other anniversaries? Don’t all ages have their unique features? Are there some more important than others? Why? And, if all ages are special, why do we give greater prominence to this one?

The truth is that, when 40 years old, we accumulated some life experience, we already showed what we are capable of; experienced periods of joy and sadness, won and lost. At this stage we know what we want (even when we still don’t have it or don’t know if it will come).  We also know what we don’t want, what we are not willing to accept (and pay the price for the option taken). We have doubts too, some more than others, but we all have them. The point is that now we understand that this is part of life, that we are not “lesser beings” for hesitating. We can accept easier the certainty of indecision and the power of our choices… even the less correct ones…

When 40 we defend our beliefs with stronger conviction and, if necessary, we dare to be different from everyone else. The proof is the example of my friend who rejects new technologies and handwrites letters just as when we were teens. Now we can do this and be praised for the folly!... We’re still not free from social criticism but we can cope better with it. J

When 40 some are in good terms with life, learned to appreciate what they have and achieved, feel less the pressure for success and assume themselves as they are. There are some who continue to work their selves, confident in some areas but dissatisfied in others, with the inner feeling that they’re still lacking fulfillment in important areas and insist on their fight. The truth is that we believe that we still have a long way to go, that we’re still on time to correct the path J

The special aura that surrounds the 40’s, to my point, has to do with this security, with this certainty and with the power of those who lived a story and still have time to live another. Yes, when 40, we all have a story to tell and another to imagine!

Ana António